Another skipped week!

Things have been hectic and I had a family emergency on Sunday that’s still sort of making this week struggle, so I will have to say sorry and give myself another week.

Again the topic is anal, and please email questions to


Episode 13 – “Female” Ejaculation

Get your lab coats you cuties because we are going to be experimenting with…ejaculation! Specifically, vaginas that ejaculate. I have my friend Witch Hazel on because she has had more experience than I, a burgeoning squirter, do. We get interrupted – rudely mind you – near the beginning but have no fear, we persevere!

*I don’t believe that female ejaculation is an appropriate term, since again not all people with vaginas are women. It’s just the common vernacular, and I mention this. It’s also why I put it in quotes.


Listen on ShoutEngine

RuinedOrgasm on tumblr

Next Topic: Ejaculation (With Vaginas)!

So in my own personal language I try to focus on genitalia and that function, rather than classify things in a gendered language of “female ejaculation”. Because, as a (trans) male, I am finding myself ejaculating a LOT more than I was when I was younger, and also, I’m not female. However, the popular term is indeed female ejaculation. For me, I’m going to refer it to just “ejaculating” or “ejaculating with a vagina”.

My friend Witch Hazel, who is new to BDSM but quite kinky in her own right, is what I call the most pro in my group of friends for she has owned the fact she can drown men with an orgasm a lot quicker than I have.

So if you have a question about ejaculation, SEND THEM QUICK! Email them at

Sex Wishlist

My featured image is from Ma’iitsoh Yazhi Photography, please visit their tumblr for their information (such as portfolio, booking sessions, gawking at their amazing photos, etc.)

I make wishlists for a lot of things for shopping online, and I keep things organized and in their own lists. One thing I realized, I never made a “sex wishlist” – what do I want for sex?

I’m pretty experienced, but I would like the following:

• Sex with more then 3 other people (meaning, there were three other people involved in my most “orgy” like thing); yes I am talking about a gang bang. Yes, I want to be in the middle of it all as a bottom.

• Done up in rope – yes, I’ve had simple two column ties on my wrists before, and Adam was doing simple things for me with the promise of more (but he passed, and we never done FULL body stuff, just pieces), and since then I’ve never done rope demo work or even privately. [Most of my demos ever was flogging/spanking stuff]. I want to be done up, I want rigging, I want suspension (in truth, suspension is a fear of mine that I want to conquer). I have some Twisted Monk cotton rope for me to practice my ties with and for the occasional bondage I run into when I am domming (usually for pay). I’d LOVE to have some of the violet hemp rope. Purple is my favorite color. I tend to get purple toys if I can.

• Something I’ve done in the past, and just want it done again – I want my back covered in wax. I loved playing with wax as a child, and as a kinky youth and young adult I just love it more. Since owning pets I really haven’t ever had candle around.

• I’ve always wanted to be in bondage and on a fuck machine. Enough said.

• I’ve been vaginally fisted, but not anally fisted. I want that.


Episode 10 – Electrostimulation

Zzzaap! It’s time to get to some shocking topics, and today’s is electrostimulation. For pleasure or pain, estim is versatile to serve a lot of different kinks and kink styles. I didn’t receive any questions for this episode, so it’s just a primer.


Listen to the episode on ShoutEngine Library


Toybag Guide to High-Tech Toys by John Warren Erotic Electrostimulation Toys

American RedCross CPR/AED and First Aid Classes

How Lemonade inspired me to pursue transition and rely on myself

“You are terrifying and strange and beautiful, someone not everyone knows how to love.”
Warsan Shire

I usually reserve getting deep touchy feely on my personal Facebook page. All my friends – and listeners probably too – know I love Beyoncé.

When Lemonade dropped, it was April 23rd in the year of our Bey 2016. I will recap my life: I was working at a very shitty hotel, I was contemplating going back into sex work, I was trying and failing to find local doctors who would work with me. I also was crushing hard on a guy, and he brushed me off cold turkey. My family was rejecting me left and right that I decided to make the step to transition, because my insurance told me I was approved to pursue whatever I desire – the catch was no one local would give me hormones or even consider surgery. I was low.

After the invention of digital downloading of music and iTunes, I rarely bought a whole album. But Beyoncé is the one exception where I’ve bought two complete albums – her self titled album, and Lemonade. After I downloaded it, I heard the words of Warsan Shire and Beyoncé. It touched upon my relationships: past and current (and would be near future), my issues with my father and looking like him, and also being independent and empowering ones self. I ended up pursuing the transgender clinic in Boston, which is a bit aways from me. I finally found competent care and once I got testosterone I felt accomplished. I even got the courage from friends and the lyrics from this album to go ahead and make this very podcast.

Yesterday, I was told that I have to lose 15-20 pounds before the surgeons will remove my breasts. I take this in, and feel emboldened.

I listen to it today, where it is the second month anniversary of taking testosterone. I traveled by bus to my haircut with it playing in my ear buds. I sang it in the shower and also when I was talking to a few would be play partners about boundaries, and told a few clients who have been dodging payment that they “..can watch my fat ass twist boy, as I bounce to the next dick boy” (Don’t Hurt Yourself). I set up a small talk session for next week while humming 6 Inch, and while I write this now and make some food I am dancing to Formation.

As said by Hattie White, Jay Z’s grandmother, on her 90th birthday:

I had my ups and downs, but I always find the inner strength to pull myself up. I was served lemons, but I made lemonade.